My Experience as a SAHM

Let me update you on my life.

  1. We packed up our entire house (but we gave away and donated half of it first).
  2. We’ve been fostering him for 2 years and we finalized his adoption on Valentines Day 2014.
  3. We moved across the country from Tacoma, WA to Nashville, TN… also on Valentines Day 2014.
  4. We arrived at our new home, me covered in our son’s vomit due to a flu bug, in just 4 days. That’s 10+ hours of driving for 4 days straight.
  5. My husband left on tour for the first weekend in our new place.
  6. When he returned we got a dog.
  7. Then he left again.

Our move was hasty because my husband is a musician. He’s on a tour based in Nashville – for 3 months. They’re doing the whole Wednesday through Sunday schedule so there was not enough time for him to come back to the west coast and move his family. So, we were already packed up and living in a hotel when we went to court to finalize Liam’s adoption. And, now, here I am in Nashville. I sometimes can’t believe I am here.

Here’s my confession: It’s only been 27 days since my last day of work and I feel like I’m losing my mind. I’ve been a Stay-at-Home-Mom for exactly 8 days and I feel so overwhelmed.

Sure, I have a lot more stressors than the average SAHM at the moment. A cross-country move, unpacking a new house, navigating a new city, making new friends, training an insane bulldog. But, I didn’t realize I had grown accustomed to the 7+ hours I spent in front of a computer screen…in a silent, clean, organized house. And here’s the funniest thing: I am better when I’m working. It’s so obvious to me now. I like working. I like making money. Liam and I are closer than ever but we’re also needing some space. I need some time away from him and he needs some time with other kids.

So, what’s the plan?! Well, my husband is in and out for the next few months. I’m going to try and find Liam a steady play group or daycare. I’m going to start looking into preschools for the fall. I’m going to continue to sneak in work (looking for photography gigs) and home projects during nap time and I’m going to try to get to bed a whole lot earlier.

Women are incredibly strong. That’s what I’ve learned through all of this. I’ve also learned that I really, really like to work. I thought that being a Stay at Home Mom was going to be a break – but it’s just the opposite. It’s hard work.

I love Liberating Working Moms for the firm stance that we take that we are proud of what we do. We are proud to work, we like to work, but we also love our children so deeply.

Quoting “Why Women Work” on Mommytracked.com -

I refused to entirely redefine who I was just because I had children. My decision to work was not at all about money or material things. It was all about me as a person. A person needs meaningful work, whatever work that might be.

Work hard, ladies!

road trippin

Driving in the moving van. 2/15/14.

 

3 Comments

  • Cherlyn says:

    OMG! I could have written this myself! I had recently {back in October} quit my full time project management job to pursue my birth & wedding photography business full time and the ever “but this way I’ll get to be with my kids more” and the “and this is the best time to be with them” because of the whole “they are only young once”. Well, for someone who has worked since she was 14 years old, I realized I am not cut out to be still working pretty much full time AND being with my kids 24/7…I realized that going into an office and having time away – I appreciated my home life more and I could turn off work when I was home. Being a freelancer while also being a mother and tended to everyone’s beck and call was probably the most difficult part – I don’t know how people can work from home with kids!

    I found that when I left my phone at home and just concentrated on my kids – we three were happy. But then I would get home to some missed inquiries that we could have really used to cover our household {if I did get the gig..but was too late in responding}..it’s been a struggle and it has been a huge learning experience and I have grown closer to my kids and I have a much much more appreciation for single parents and stay at home moms..and we will continue to grow, to learn and struggle…and that’s ok.

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